


Don't Need an Excuse

by amandateaches



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Brief allusion to smut, Dean In Love, F/M, fluffernutter fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:20:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23230837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amandateaches/pseuds/amandateaches
Summary: Dean thinks about Y/N all the time. This is just a series of those moments.
Relationships: Dean Winchester & You, Dean Winchester/You
Comments: 9
Kudos: 30





	Don't Need an Excuse

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for @impala-dreamer‘s Make Me Feel It Challenge, based off the song Thinking of You by Dierks Bentley. Blame the song, not me.

Dean slammed the car door shut, smiling softly as the soles of his boots hit the dewy grass beneath. The smell hit his nostrils in an instant, quickly sending his mind racing back to the last time he’d smelled grass like that.

~

“Dean, where are we going?” Y/N asked, her heels sinking deeper into the grass with every step.

“Hold on,” he replied, gripping her hand tighter as he half-guided, half-pulled her up the last of the hill. “We’re almost there.”

“Okay,” she laughed, using her free hand to brush a stray hair out of her face, her concentration intently focused on her feet. “But, I didn’t didn’t think to dress for a hike when you said ‘night on the town’. Maybe if’d you been a little more specific…”

Her voice trailed off when he stopped walking and dropped his hand, her eyes rising to find a large, checkered picnic blanket laid out on the ground in front of them, the moonlight reflecting off the various plates and covered dishes spread across it.

Dean sucked in a breath, biting the inside of his cheek as he watched, trying to gauge her reaction. “I know the case went a little longer than I thought it would, and it made us miss our reservations, but I figured this might…”

“It’s perfect,” she whispered, her face breaking into a smile so radiant, he knew he’d never be able to forget it. “You did all this?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, his smile growing as his enthusiasm quickly caught up with hers. “I promised you an amazing first date, and I wanted to make sure I delivered. You like it?”

“I love it,” she assured, nodding to emphasize the point as she stepped a little closer. “It’s perfect, Dean, really.”

“I’m glad you like it,” he replied, reaching his hand out to intertwine it with hers again. “I’m pretty sure I’ve changed my mind about 50 times trying to decide what to do. I know we’ve been friends for years but this, this is different, Y/N. I tried to think of what’d make you the most happy.”

Her eyes widened, her pupils dilating ever so slightly in surprise. “You think about that kinda stuff?”

He smiled, raising his free hand to brush the backs of his knuckles against her cheek. “I don’t need an excuse to think about you, Y/N. I already do it all the time.”

His eyes dropped to her lips and he leaned in, but he hesitated as he heard a soft click, seconds before they were drenched with a wall of water.

“The sprinklers!” she screamed, the squeal coming out more as a laugh than out of fear. “Dean!”

“I’ll save you!” he declared dramatically, scooping her up into his arms and spinning her around under the cascading water. “Never fear, my lady!”

“God, you’re such a dork!” she cried, laughing even harder as she threw her head back, letting the droplets fall onto her cheeks. He held her close, his eyes brightening as they danced across her face. The way she looked in his arms, he wasn’t in a big hurry to get her out of the way anyway.

~

Dean smiled as the memory faded, and he took a few steps, in no hurry to make it across the grass. He closed his eyes and tilted his face up to the sun, breathing in the fresh, spring air. It wasn’t hard to think of her. It seemed like every breeze, every moment, brought her to the forefront of his mind. She was in his soul, her joy, her love intertwined with every cell in his body, and just the thought of her brought such a sense of calm and peace to his entire being.

As he continued walking, his eyes fell to the sprinkling of flowers scattered across the grass, and his mind flashed back to another moment with her, one of the happiest of his life.

~

He traced the freckles down her side, his hand trailing down slowly until it rested against her hip bone. His touch was feather-light, but she still stirred, not even opening her eyes as she grinned. “Aren’t you supposed to be leaving for a hunt?”

“I was,” he muttered playfully, his hand moving even lower, down to her thigh. “But, I sent Sammy on without me.”

Her eyes sprang open, her brows tightening in confusion. “You did?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, his eyes still intently focused on his mission, his hand continuing to move across her body. “It’s just a simple salt and burn. He can handle it. And, Jody’ll be there to back him up. Besides, I’ve got something much more important to do here.”

Her breath inhaled sharply as his hand dropped between her thighs. “Oh.h…yeah? What’s that?”

“This,” he replied, removing his hand to pull a single red rose out from behind his back. “Happy anniversary, baby.”

“You remembered,” she exclaimed, a smile brightening her face as she reached out and grabbed the rose.

“Course I did,” he laughed, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close against his chest. “Best day of my life.”

“Ha! You liar!” she chuckled, but she snuggled closer, breathing him in. “Best day of my life, too.”

He placed a kiss to her head, dropping his forehead to rest against hers. “Sometimes I think it’s a little too good to be true.”

“What is?”

“This. Us.” He felt her body stiffen, waiting for an explanation. “I don’t know, Y/N. Sometimes it just feels that with everything I’ve done, I don’t deserve this. Deserve you.”

She pulled back, and he could see the confusion in her eyes, the disbelief. “Dean Winchester, you listen to me. You deserve every second of this. Every moment of our last year together has proven that.”

He closed his eyes and swallowed, wanting to believe her, if even for a second. “But, what if I don’t? What if it’s all just a dream I’m gonna wake up from and realize that you’re gone and I’m paying for my mistakes like I deserve.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” she whispered, her voice dropping low as she met his eyes, her gaze steady and sure. “That is not gonna happen. Face it, Winchester, you’re stuck with me. I’m not leaving, not ever.”

“Y/N…”

“Dean,” she interrupted, placing her hands firmly on his face. “You deserve this. I deserve this. Nothing is going to change that. I love you, Dean Winchester, now, and for every anniversary after this.”

“I love you, too,” he echoed, letting himself relax back into her. “You’re all I need, Y/N.”

“Good,” she laughed, taking the opportunity to be the one to let her hand start roaming lower. “Cause, I’m not planning on leaving anytime soon.”

~

By the time he refocused, leaving the memory behind, he’d arrived at his destination, staring quietly down at the small headstone marked with two solitary lines: Y/N Y/L/N, Beloved Wife and Friend.

“You know,” he started, trying to find the right words. “You’d probably be mad as hell that I’m even here right now. I know you made me promise to move on after you were gone, but I can’t…I can’t.” He paused, staring down at his shoes, softly kicking the gravel back and forth. “You made promises too, Y/N. You promised you’d never leave, and look what happened. It’s, it’s our anniversary, and I can’t…I can’t just leave you here. I know you want me to move on, to find happiness again, something else to think about, but…” He smiled, her love spreading across his heart. “But, you know I never need an excuse to think about you, right?” He stooped down, placing his hand against the headstone with a grin. “I love you, Y/N…I miss you. Why’d you have to go?”


End file.
